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Author’s Notes

Welcome to behind the scenes and inside the mind of the

And now we can see where the evil was born.

This story has so many layers, and I know I’m overwhelming you, but I thought I needed to do that because I can.

I believe that much of our past is tied to our present actions, and I wanted to bring that to life. This story was my way of illustrating how our relationships today and how we interact with others are already shaped by who we are, where we come from, and the experiences we’ve had in the past.

Also, when I knew I had to go through six journals, I didn’t want to bore you with chapter after chapter of read-throughs, so I planned out these huge portions to give you context without boring you to death. Plus, I know a couple of you want to get back to bumping and grinding.

Don’t forget that the Tier levels are now open, with five slots available for free in the Engagement Tier. However, this opportunity’s only for serious readers, so don’t delay.

Enjoy… Happy Reading. Your author, Sylvia Hubbard

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Chapter 17.2 Dear Tori

The first journal stopped, and Tori immediately went up to the attic to gather the rest of the journals to find out what her father wrote about next.

I named you Tori because I knew that once I made that promise to your mother, you would tear my life apart. I’d be torn between my love and desire, but my promise to you.

Tori had to stop reading because her chest started to hurt. Torn? Was she the problem all her family’s life?

Please understand that, coming from a poor family but with powerful business acumen, is a fate worse than death. So many intelligent poor people out there on the streets, and I was not going to be one of them. No one believes in what you can achieve unless you have the money, a strong network, and the power to back it up. I needed the money for my business and the networks Kimmie provided, so I gave my all to loving another man’s child. Kimmie made sure you were selfish and spoiled on purpose. The world revolved around Tori. Your mother made sure you grew up being rewarded for bullying and being a horrible person on purpose. Yet, Kimmie didn’t understand the monster Amos was and that the blood that ran through his veins also ran through yours.

Keir detailed different instances in Tori’s life where he had seen her commit horrible, selfish acts and how Kimmie would encourage Tori, as if it were a game, to her mother. This filled up at least two of the journals until Tori was in her teens.

By this time, after reading, Tori was in tears because the majority of the things she had blocked away had come flooding back, and she was crying at how terrible she really was.

Once or twice, the thought crossed her mind to burn these journals so no one would ever know the awful person she had been.

During this time, Sherrie’s life was going downhill. Amos was becoming more abusive, and a lot of times, the boys were watching their mother’s misery.

You were a monster on your own, and with Kimmie’s help, you became a rotten person. I saw you hurt people who wanted to be your friends, be cruel to the weak and sick for fun, and be so selfish that you made strong people cry. And there was nothing I could do but pat you on your back and say you were right and everyone else was wrong.

Tori stopped again, jumping out of the bed and throwing the headphones off her head.

Her father was not her father, and that meant… well, at least she hadn’t committed incest with the Carter brothers, but… wait, did they know the truth? Did Malea know?

A chill swept through her as she glared at the journals.

Picking up the fourth journal, Tori braved herself and started reading.

At four in the morning, Sherrie called me from the precinct. Kevin was arrested and was being sent to juvie because he had attacked Amos. She needed my help, but Kimmie said I wasn’t to help. I did it anyway. I paid the lawyer to help Sherrie behind Kimmie’s back to get Kevin out of juvie, and then I spent money to find out whatever we could about Amos.

The report destroyed me. Kimmie had no idea what she had done – Who she had had a child with! And for the very first time in my life, I really felt bad for my daughter, who was not my daughter.

My guilt increased because my sins and lustful addiction had produced you, and you never asked for this.

There was an insert of a piece of paper, a lawyer’s report, and Tori put it aside, not wanting to read it yet. There was also a newspaper cutout on the murder of the lawyer who had written up the report in a fatal carjacking by an unknown suspect, and summed up as part of Detroit’s horrible crime city. In the sidebar of the cutout, her father had written, AMOS.

Knowing how far Amos would go, Sherrie and I knew we had to protect my sons and her. I don’t know when you’ll be reading this, Tori. Hopefully, when I’m long gone, but I must confess, making Amos disappear was the easiest evil I have committed in my life, and I do not feel any remorse.

Below that paragraph was a newspaper article saying that Amos Carter, father of three, had been missing and would be pronounced dead. His vehicle was found in the Detroit River and in the basement of the apartment he lived in with his wife, Sherrie Carter, and their sons. A large amount of his blood had been found down the drain. Sherrie and her sons had been on a vacation trip at a swimming resort for two weeks during the time of his disappearance. Amos Carter had been known in the neighborhood with several people on the wrong side of the law and lots of enemies; the police didn’t suspect his wife as a possible suspect in his disappearance.

No body; no case, her father had written. No one cared for him.

I know Kimmie became scared when Amos suddenly disappeared, and I know it was her pressing the cop to keep the case open, but when the police gave up, she probably realized how far I would go to help Sherrie.

I may not have proof, but I know what you did, Kimmie had told me the night before she left.

Kimmie took what she had and walked away from her life, burdening Keir with two daughters, swearing in her Dear John letter that Keir would never look for her. If he broke his promise, she’d let the authorities know her suspicions and then reveal to Tori about her real parentage.

It was almost two in the morning, and Tori knew she should get some rest, but there were still the fifth and the sixth journals she wanted to tackle. Going back to the fourth journal, on the side of the newspaper article, there was the address of the school she was currently turning into a group home, written by her father, and then an X mark. Tori was almost tempted to call Duncan, who could probably figure out everything, but she knew calling him in the middle of the night would be odd.

No, all of them needed to be there when she told them about the journals.

She would see them tonight at the Cosgrove’s, but she would have to wait until afterwards.

Checking her calendar, she only needed to attend to a few matters for her tenants, but there was still more work to catch up on and then to finalize the land bank purchase.

Tori wanted to lose her mind over what she had read. How could her father have kept this secret for so long? Allow her to be raised like this?

The animosity her mother always felt?

Tori was a child who had been used like a toy. A game! A device to control Keir.

She had been manipulated all her life to hurt Keir the most, even after her mother left.

Needing to binge on something, she went downstairs and was pleased with the fruit trays Duncan had put in with the groceries, and she stuffed her face before returning to the journals again.

With Kimmie gone, I could focus on Sherrie. Initially, we tried to meet in secret. I dated other women, so you could get used to the idea that I was a single man again, and I wanted to continue my life. Malea was depressed most of the time because she missed her mother, but you were adamant about no one being around. You barely let Malea show me affection. After it was determined that Kimmie was not coming back, you became even more determined to have me all to yourself.

I knew there was no way to change your mind about me seeing anyone, so Sherrie and I decided to continue to keep our love affair a secret until Kevin and Duncan realized the truth. I knew we couldn’t hide it from you or Shawn for long after that, and hated keeping secrets from each other. Sherrie and I decided to introduce our relationship slowly. Shawn was all for it, but you wanted me all to yourself as you always had.

I got to be the father to the boys they never had. It was so wonderful to show them kindness, maturity, and love. I loved showing their mother love in front of them, so they understood how to treat a woman, and it felt awesome to be able to show another woman love instead of keeping it all for you, Tori.

The way he wrote her name spoke volumes. There was no love in that. Tori felt it off the page.

Sherrie was, and will always be, my true love. I’m not afraid to admit it in these pages because I know I can never look into your eyes and tell you this to your face.

So her father had been seeing Sherrie longer than Tori had known, and the boys also knew that but had never said anything to her.

We tried everything. I even bribed you a couple of times to get you to accept some family trips and get-togethers. Kevin and Duncan were disgusted with how we made it all about you, but what could we do? Sherrie knew the threat Kimmie had made, and even if we didn’t know where Kimmie was, there was still the fear that Kimmie would say something. I wasn’t going to lose the business networks and wealth I’d acquired and reveal my lustful addictions to the world, so we continued to play Kimmie’s game.

It drove Sherrie to madness because she wanted to be around me, but knew there was no way to keep you away from me.

And you lived up to your nature, tearing things apart – hearts, relationships, and mental statues. I could see the madness growing in Sherrie more and more, as she thought we could be together after waiting her whole life for me, but you made sure it would never happen.

Do you remember your wish?

I do. You said it in front of Sherrie and me.

You said you wished Sherrie would go away forever.

On your sixteenth birthday, I knew your wish had to be my command.

So I went on that last trip with her and told her that I’d have to give her up for you. And she understood. Our lust, sins, and shameful desires had caught up with us, and if we didn’t want all our secrets to come to the surface, we had to stay apart.

How was I to know it was the worst thing to do to her and my boys? But what was I to do? I had to make this sacrifice for you, Tori. But I didn’t know the madness was stronger than ever with Sherrie. Amos’s sickness was still there even though we had gotten rid of him.

And once Sherrie and I broke up, the sickness grew inside of her even more.

Shawn never deserved what his mother put him through, and I take that guilt upon myself for what I left him to endure as well.

Tori’s eyes were so fixed on the journal that she found herself sitting on the side of the bed, her knees drawn up to her chest, the fifth journal in front of her, wide-eyed.

Today you graduated from high school. At this point in my life, I’ve sold all my business. I thought that if I gave up everything Kimmie had helped me acquire, I could move on and be with Sherrie again, but Kimmie knew my intentions, and the message she sent you for your graduation was a reminder to me of both the promise and the threat.

Your mother wrote: All that you are and all that you will be is because your father promises to love you with all of his heart until his dying days, and my dedication to make sure he keeps that promise until the end.

Tori never thought about it that way, but she didn’t know the truth from the past, and now that it was out, those words seemed darker and more malicious.

For a couple of years, her father documented how he used the money from his business to ensure Tori graduated from college, while also reminding her of what he would love to do. At least these entries helped her with the project.

If I can’t find happiness and peace in the life I’ve lived, then please give Sherrie and me the peace we need in our next life together, so that no one will ever know what we did to be together.

Tori scrambled to her bedside table and found a highlighter to put on this paragraph.

Her father made sure to include Tori in his dream of taking the apartment where he and Sherrie grew up, found love, and even conceived each of their sons, to buy. And then he wrote about how he manipulated Tori to actually care about his dreams of turning the courtyard and school into a group home.

This way, no one will know the truth, and with it being a much-needed business in the city, no one will ever suspect the secrets it holds.

There was an obituary showing Kimmie’s death, which Tori remembered her mother dying when she was in her last year of college, but since she had never been close to her mother, it really hadn’t mattered to her.

Although she did remember Malea taking it very hard, Tori felt that was what Scott was for. Tori had even convinced her father that he didn’t need to attend the funeral, which was located on the other side of the world.

That was probably the only good thing about your control over me. I didn’t want to attend the funeral anyway for that vicious, malicious woman, whom I knew was a mistake in marrying for my greed. It was probably the first time in my life that I secretly thanked you.

Yes, I did some awful things to make sure I dragged myself out of poverty, and I bet if I could have been a real husband to Kimmie, she would have had a better heart, but what was done was done.

And I had lived my life the way I did, and I sacrificed myself for what I did, keeping my promise to you. Secrets and all, I have no regrets, Tori.

The secrets? Tori wondered and knew she needed Duncan’s help.

At the same time she had this thought, she heard the rumbling of thunder outside. Tori picked up her cell and saw that Beck had sent a message stating that there would be torrential morning storms, and they would postpone building the sheds. As a result, no construction would be done, but his crew would make up for it this weekend.

Looking at the journal again, Tori could feel how, in the mid-years of her father’s life, he was starting to feel the brunt of his decisions, accept them, and in his writings, he was very angry, resentful, yet hopeful that his influence could help Tori do what he needed her to do.

And it had. Tori was fulfilling her father’s wish.

She also saw herself as not a good person and had wanted to change that, but accepted that the bridges she had burned could not be undone. Additionally, there was something about her that wasn’t a good thing, and she needed to be alone.

Hence, the life she lived.

The rain hit against the windows of the apartment hard in time to her racing her, feeling her father’s pain.

He documented every time he’d met with Tori after college. What they discussed, and how he would constantly remind her of what he needed her to do for him, and how she made promises to fulfill those needs.

You could be making promises just to shut me up. I didn’t know how my influence in your life would help me, but when you did buy the apartments, I knew we were on the way.

By this time, though, I knew it was too late for me and Sherrie, and the boys most likely hated me, and I knew they hated you. Although I was away from the love of my life, I remained dedicated to ensuring that no one ever discovered what we did.

You, Tori, would make sure that happened. You!

That was the end of the fifth journal, and she started the last one scared of what she was going to read.

Tori knew reading this was going to change her life for sure, and she had a feeling her father knew this as well. That’s why he had written these journals, but she wished he didnt have the guts to give them to her while he was still alive.

___ *** ___

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Her Substitute Husband… His Brothers (c) 2025 Sylvia Hubbard All Rights Reserved

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
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